Dramatis Personae
Dr. Cretog Vesuvius is a registered Hoemeopathic practicioner
whose treatise, Principles of Behavior Modification, served as the
inspiration for Schwa's notorious Day Care Center experiments.
Dr. Vesuvius currently practices Orgone Therapy and Reiki Pointed
Stick Therapy from his home in Salt Lake City where he remains under
home confinement. The Doktor plays five string stun guitar and slide
corn muffin. His favorite color is brown.
Motom Boutique is famous for his colorful headgear and his ear
piercing screams which are strangely reminiscent of singing. A full
blooded Uzbek warrior, Motom can wrestle a llama into submission in
under three minutes and his snake-handling skills are second to
none. Hounded by the police for a crime he didn't commit, he leads the
life of a lonesome drifter with a heart of gold. He plays bass.
MC Schwa is a classically trained violinist who abandoned his
position with the London Philharmonic and took up the tabla after a
tragic sweat lodge incident. He was driven to madness when the
generic hook-and-loop fasteners on his lodge inexplicably refused to
unhook, and turned a simple vision quest into a mind bending four-day
ordeal. Ever since, he has had a mystical fascination with Velcro(tm)
and often sings its praises in story and song. Although MC Schwa eats
no meat, he is and avid hunter of fur-bearing mammals large and
small.
Jah Schwa believes the lack of a fuctioning cerebral cortex
should be no barrier to a fulfilling career in the arts and
entertainment industry. A decorated gulf war veteran, he spends his
days in the law library researching his case against the Trilateral
Commission, and his nights stalking various local television
reporters. His favorite color is white and his favorite food is cough
syrup.
Major Hemisphere has never been convicted of any
crimes in the state of Nevada.